I will assume that most of us have been in a situation where we have tried to get a job
Even if you haven’t, I am sure there has been some point in your life where you have tried to get some work, maybe it was mowing the lawn or whatever, I don’t know
Anyways, my point!
Would it make sense to accept a job where you exchange your time, energy, intellect, etc… for some type of compensation, without knowing what you would get in return?
I don’t know about you, but that sounds like a bad idea
Doesn’t it seem equally as odd to just accept someone’s “offer” when they say “I love you” or accept their physical advances without out knowing what the terms of the deal really are?
Why do we often feel compelled to say “I love you” back, or accept someone’s emotions and feel obligated in some conscious or subconscious way to return them?
For a lot of people, myself included, they enjoy hearing that someone cares for them that it seems to rob them of their intellect
For those of us that are insecure, afraid of being alone, or who just like to feel that someone cares for them when we are down, we like to feel validated by the affection and attention of others
We often seek this attention through flirting, friendliness, cheating, and all sorts of behaviors that show that we like a short-term ego boost from time to time, often at the expense of a long-term one
For me, if something becomes physical too soon, I get attached to people and open myself up emotionally in a way that is usually not a very good idea because I don’t know the other person well enough
I could go on for weeks, but they all boiled down to me wanting to be validated so much that I held onto people if they showed even the slightest signs of affection for me
Because of this I have not enjoyed relationships that made me feel good about myself, and most of them ended with me totally exhausted and feeling worse than before I got into them
As I continue to journey through life, I have come to understand that people can care for one another, and in some cases really love each other, but it doesn’t mean that the relationship will work out or be beneficial. This is true of relationships that include family members, business partnerships, romantic relationships, and every other type of relationship there is
Look at it this way, I like eating ice cream, but if I eat too much I regret it for a number of reasons
However, if I eat vegetables non-stop (yeah right), then there won’t be any negative consequences
So instead of accepting something just because it seems good in the heat of a particularly enjoyable moment, let’s be patient and make sure it is an arrangement that will make us happy in both the long and short-term
Know what we are signing up for!
Our long-term happiness is more important than any short-term experience, no matter what it is or how fun it may seem