My very good friend, and our company’s CTO, Gilbert returned today from Belgium, where he was with his brother during the final stages of his terminal brain cancer
Gilbert is a really good friend and it was upsetting to see him go through a loss like that, but he is such a wonderful person and he seems like he has bounced back a little bit already
We were out for lunch today, talking about random things and he made this funny face on my eggs
It was a simple, pointless thing, but it made us both laugh hysterically
I love my friends, and I cherish each one of them as if they were family, as each one is hand picked because they are special in some way
Making funny faces on eggs and then being able to talk about philosophy and life are why I care about Gilbert so much, and because he is a real, honest person
I can’t imagine making time for any other type of person
It is so important to be selective about who we spend our time with, because our time is the only thing in life we can never get back
Good friends, and bad friends, have a tremendous impact on us as they are usually the people we turn to for advice, and share perspectives on life with
Most people can look at their friends and see that they have many acquaintances, but not many actual friends
I would classify acquaintances as the activity buddies where the conversations are light, the activities are numerous and varied, the drinks get plowed through, and no personal growth ever happens
Sometimes you work with them, sometimes they are a friend of a friend or a familiar face from school, but the reality is, these people are all strangers because you don’t know them and they don’t know you
These types of social connections don’t do anything other than pass time, and don’t lead to anything, so what is the point?
The Value Of Our Time
We are raised with the notion that we have the ability to choose how we spend our time, but we aren’t raised to think that our time is valuable. However, the advertising world thinks we are valuable as they pay trillions of dollars to secure our time and attention–that should tell you something
Starting as children, companies advertise to us and try to create connections through all sorts of advertising, hoping to inspire us to buy their toys, food, clothes, etc…
This only gets worse as we get older as the stakes become higher with advertisers trying to sell us cars, expensive clothes and accessories, vacations, homes, etc…
If advertisers want our attention and time so badly that they spend big money trying to get it, we should take a lesson from this
Going Places And Buying Things Is Fun, But Emotional Journeys Are Better
People typically love going on vacations, going to new bars and clubs, discovering new restaurants, etc…
But what about the emotional journeys where people learn who they really are, and what they want out of life?
Rather than discovering what it feels like to get drunk in a new bar, overpay for food that our short-memoried tongues will forget as soon as we swallow it or spend all day shopping for clothes we won’t care about in a few months, why not spend time becoming emotionally healthy and see what it feels like to not be insecure or afraid to be alone, discover the joy of waking up on a Saturday without a massive hangover or actually getting to know the person we wake up next to by sharing our thoughts and feelings?
Rather than find the right people to go get drunk or go on vacations with, try to find people will be great emotional journey buddies
I guarantee they are harder to find, so start looking now!